Mel's Heart

My thoughts about God, living for Him, being a writer, wife, mom, and child of God

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Battle with Truth and Thanksgiving and Worship

Today I had a victorious breakthrough on some junk I've been battling - praise God. To be honest, I battle constantly insecurity. And I share that because I think so many women battle that same demon. And yes, I think it's a demon spirit straight from the pit of hell.

So here I am in a calling of speaking and writing. I have not doubted this calling since about four years ago when I began to know that this is what God wanted me to do. I question my ability, but not calling.

I love to write so I don't have insecurities about that - at least not usually:)
But I do have insecurities about speaking. You see, there are many, many things in my past and thoughts in my head, saying things like, what makes you think you can speak? what makes you think anyone wants to listen to you?

So as I've been writing a talk this past week I have just felt so defeated. And then I was just so mad at myself for feeling that way. And then God reminded me not to get mad at myself - to get mad at the enemy, Satan.

The breakthrough came this morning as I was reading from
Galatians 4:4,5 But when the fullness of the time came, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, born under the Law, so that He might redeem those who were under the Law, that we might receive the adoption as sons.

Galatians 4:9 But now that you have come to know God, or rather to be known by God, how is it that you turn back again to the weak and worthless elemental things, to which you desire to be enslaved all over again?

You see, I was trying to go back living under the Law - I was starting to get into old patterns of thinking I had to earn God's approval of my speaking; that's what the law is - the opposite of grace, as my friend Kelly Tyler and I were talking about recently. When we live under legalism, we feel guilt, condemnation, insecurity. The Law puts our eyes on ourselves - our own performance, our shortcomings. Living in grace puts our eyes on God,exactly where they need to be.

Gal 4:9 says that turning back to that way of living is turning back to what is absolutely the most worthless way of living. It's living in slavery and bondage - bondage to self, bondage to others' approval, bondage to fear, bondage to performance, bondgage to the worlds' inaccurate measure of success.

Thank you Lord Jesus that you set us free! We are your precious children so we can walk in your love and truth and grace.

Soo.... How do we live in grace, in the Spirit?
1)fill our minds with God and His truth
2)thank Him
3) praise HIm

So that's what I'm doing today and this day forward! I hope you will do the same! Amen!


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